Travolta and Olivia have apparently signed on to GREASE sequel
aintitcool.com
It's going to suck. They're going to be parents of a teenager and they're going to be invited to a Grease reunion that they're favored to win, but their kid will need them to be elsewhere and they will agonize and sing and the kid will agonize and sing and, in the end, IT WILL SUCK!
McDonald's gets fruity
Mercury News British Mickey D's will sell grapes and sliced apples. Finally something for dad as he pulls in for kids mcnuggets for the ten thousandth time.
The Broken Phallus of Harvard Yard
The Harvard Crimson Online
Monday we linked to the busted busty-snowwoman and today we link to a nine foot tall snow phallus that has Harvard all in a tizzy. What all this proves is that IT'S TIME FOR WINTER TO END!.
Judge Duct Tapes Defendant's Mouth Shut
Newsday
I'm sorry, but the judge should have locked this idiot up for 30 days, rather than resorting to this. It cheapens the bench.
Sajak's giving talk TV another spin
NY Daily News Pat Sajak interviewing celebrities? C'mon, who's going to watch this? Not me or anyone I know. We linked yesterday to Donahue's failed talk show, and it's only a matter of time before we link to Sajak's failure as well.
Police investigate report of floating condom
Boulder News
An unwrapped condom reportedly floated into a swimmer's mouth in a Colorado swimming pool. You see, my Darling Wife, there are some advantages to not swimming!
MP apologizes for calling Americans 'bastards'
CBC
Yeah, she doesn't mean it. Sure, we all believe that. I'm sure the quip won't hurt her chances of re-election, but put that trip down to DisneyWorld on hold, Lady.
Photo of the Day
Yahoo
In counterpoint to the photos Ed loves to scandalize us with, here's something
a bit different - and safe for office viewing!
Steeped in Science
LA Times
I never could quite get into tea because most of them tasted like wet paper.
Hopefully we'll start seeing more loose tea readily available at local markets like
the gourmet, self-grind coffee we've seen for years. Login: edportals, password: edportals
Great White once a Grammy nominee
USA Today
A short bio of the now-tragic 80's band. And while we're looking at bio's, here's some profiles of a few of the dead. Note that more than one had no real interest in 80's rock, but were tragically in the wrong place at the wrong time.
Way beyond incorrect
Salon.com
I hate Bill Maher. He is not funny; he is not nice to look at; I'd rather watch bird-shit dry. So, why does this guy keep resurfacing? I think it's because he keeps pushing the envelope and people want to see the latest controversy. For instance, last Friday night he had a very unfunny female comic on and after she was done, as the credits were rolling, he referred to her profane humor saying "I can't believe that her boyfriend gets his cock kissed by that mouth." The audience howled in disbelief, the guests squirmed and the camera lights dimmed. Stay tuned, America, for the next train wreck.
Thursday 20 February
Out of Phone Numbers? Add Digits
Wired
Oh, man, people are not going to like this: "Someday soon North American telephone numbers might add up to 12 digits, including area code, instead of the current 10."
Medical Residents Limited to 80-Hour Week
Reuters
I sure wish they would have had this twenty years ago when my Darling Wife was slugging her way through the process. Of course what this will mean is that the new crop of docs will get sneered at by their older peers for being soft.
It's Hollywood that makes them despise us
Christian Science Monitor
Interesting piece that blames Hollywood for a large part of the bad image America gets abroad. If true, it makes for a strange dichotomy: Hollywood gives America a bad image while, at the same time, it's actors lead the anti-War movement. What that all means, I am not sure, but I'm headed out of town for the weekend and I'll have plenty of driving time to think this one over. Have a nice weekend, everybody, and net.Headlines will return Monday,
Capital professor reveals DNA damage is no picnic
The Scotsman.com
A Scottish prof claims that sitting on grass, getting too much sunshine and drinking Earl Grey tea is bad for your DNA. Time to switch to green tea, all you Earl-Grey'ers.
Why I ditched Buddhism
Slate
A former Catholic explains why he is now also a former Buddhist. He makes some valid points but also some weak ones, such as hit hit on Buddhism for their male emphasis, which does not occur here in the West.
Tuesday 18 February
EU Warns Iraq It Faces 'Last Chance'
AP
This reminds me so much of parenting. My Darling Wife gets so mad when i start giving the kids "just one last time" warnings, over and over. But, like the French, I am a lover, not a warrior, darling!
Winter storm buries state
Sunspot.net
We didn't get 40 inches like some parts of Maryland did, but we're at 2 feet so far. It's been a lot less dread for me, though, since both my Darling Wife and I now drive dreaded SUVs.
Report: Quality Falls at Big TV Stations
Yahoo AP
"Television stations owned by big, out-of-town companies tend to produce lower-quality newscasts than those owned by smaller groups, a study by a journalism think tank has concluded." Now, why would that be news? Out-of-town landlords have traditionally not given a damn, as long as the profits roll on in.
Osbourne drops UK visit over terror fears
BBC
Singer Kelly Osbourne has pulled out of a promotional trip to the UK because of the risk of terrorist attacks. Singer? Don't they mean whiner? The only terrorist attack she has to worry about is an attack on her because she can't sing. I think this is what's wrong with the show in general this year. The Osbournes are taking themselves far too seriously. As if they somehow deserve the media spotlight, which they don't. They've lost their innocence.
U.S. Endorses Merging Telephone, Internet Numbers
Reuters
Check this out: "The Department of Commerce said it will support an electronic-numbering system, known as ENUM, which would allow consumers to specify a single identifier for their telephone numbers, e-mail and Instant Messaging (news - web sites) addresses, fax numbers, and mobile phone numbers." And I want my number to be 7.
McDonald's plans big overhaul for image
USA Today
You can get through the Wendy's drive-thru in about a quarter of the time, but the food at both sucks. I'd like to see a complete overhaul of the menu, but that's not likely. They'll probably tweak it some and people will keep staying away in droves.
Canada's National Post
Roger Ebert: Ads are fine for television or newspapers ...
Ebert rants against the ads that are now being run, before the movies, but I never see any rants about "previews", and what are they, if not ads?
Professional wrestler Curt Hennig found dead in Brandon hotel
HeraldTribune.com
Officials said foul play wasn't suspected, which, to me, screams STEROIDS!. Add Hennig to the list of middle-aged wrestlers who have mysteriously dropped dead, such as Rick Rude,Davy Boy Smith and Brian Pillman. It's a disgrace and continues to this very day, if one is to judge the unnatural physiques of today's young wrestlers. Pro Wrestling should not get away with this. Some federal investigation process is needed to get this out in the open, or more middle aged former-wrestlers are going to die prematurely.
Friday 07 February
184, 133, 209, 183
Rather than dig up four links for today I took three of our kids bowling last night and my scores are listed above. While we were out there, alongside the locals who were singing along with the Faith Hill on the very loudspeakers, I got to thinking about bowling and Iraq. Is there bowling in Iraq? I doubt it, though there is a Bowling for Iraq article online, but it's a bit about Michael Moore's 'Bowling for Columbine' instead. In fact, a Google search of the exact phrase bowling in Iraq comes up with no results. Zero. Bowling in Canada, on the other hand, has 132 results, Bowling in Japan 155, even Bowling in Seattle has 20 results. I'm not saying we should bomb Iraq because they don't bowl, but we could perhaps insist they incorporate bowling into their miserable bowling-less lives. Mandate that they open bowling alleys, but without the adjacent tanning salons. They don't need that. And we could jam their airwaves with old bowling TV shows from the 50's. I watched and loved them, they should too. If they know what's good for them. Finally, God is on our side, because we know that God is a bowler. We hear him tossing strikes and converting 7-10 splits all the time.
Thursday 06 February
Foam theory 'doesn't make sense'
BBC
Yeah, it's hard to believe that 2.6 lbs could bring the Columbia down, but then box-cutters brought down the WTC.
Mickey Mouse Clubbed
Reason.com
"Earlier this week, the Supreme Court ruled that the Sonny Bono Copyright Term Extension Act of 1998—so named in honor of the late Rep. Bono, and not because it extended his copyright terms—was constitutional." What does that mean? Well, it means at least another 20 years of slavery for Mickey Mouse and the article finishes with a neat interview with Mickey, er Bruce.
Saddam exiled to MSNBC
Borowitz Report
We celebrate our 3rd anniversary of linkage with this funny, brief bit: "'At MSNBC, Saddam could get up to all kinds of mischief," Mr. Sanderson said. "There'll be no one watching.' "
We started net.Headlines with nine links on February 4, 2000. Of those nine links only two are still active. The very first link was about Dave Letterman returning from his heart attack. It wasn't until March 01, 2000 that I added my comments, upon the urging of an anonymous reader, with the first comment predicting that Microsoft would soon buy the 10 Commandments. We started adding reader comments over a year ago, but had problems finding a reliable server. We've finally found one and now the comments are often the only reason to view the site. Thanks for your patience and keep the comments coming.
Photo of the Day
Yahoo
Just how crazy are people??? Here is a fine example. VERY CRAZY!
Paul Krugman: A Failed Mission
NY Times
Krugman lays out a very logical case against manned space flights. Note that the justification for manned flights is always cloaked in terms of "exploring" and "pioneering" rather than in results. Results that could be accomplished, at a far safer coast with unmanned flights. Meanwhile, Foxnews sadly reports that Couple Who Lost Son on Sept. 11 Loses Niece on Shuttle. Finally, The Sydney Morning Herald reports that schoolkids in Melbourne are sad because Australian space spiders perish.
India's lost girls
BBC
A sad piece about abortion in India where, it turns out, it's being used to eliminate female births. This has been going on for years and now some Indian states are running out of potential brides.
Doctors Say Ephedra Use Is Unsafe
NY Times
Too bad my Darling Wife is away this week because she needs to read this: "the risks are substantial." I'm throwing the stuff away before she gets back.
Rock legend charged with murder
BBC
Celebritiy murderers are becoming rather commonplace. Maybe they'll have to open a celebrity wing at the LA County Jail.
Japanese Style emoticons
Hiroette.com
I love the "wow" emoticon! And how about (>_< )( >_<) which expresses disagreement!
Streep 'robbed' of awards nods
BBC
I don't care about the Screen Actors Guild (SAG) awards but I will use this as a springboard to pimp Streep's latest Adaptation. It's verbally witty and keeps you on your toes throughout.
Lion Rips Woman's Arm Off
Reuters
Think you had a bad day recently? Try this: "A lioness in a Spanish animal sanctuary ripped the right arm off a British tourist after the 54-year old woman clambered up a barrier and stuck her fingers inside the cage." While we're on the subject of animals, remember the other day when we linked to the house with 500 dogs and the house with 60 cats? Well, Jeff from Milwaukee sends in this link about a house with 440 guinea pigs running wild in it. Finally, BC from BC sends in a link describing a puppy mill that got shut down, which included 36 dogs, 16 chickens and two rabbits.
Thursday 30 January
I Can't Hear Myself Think!
Discover Magazine
"Urban noise levels, such as those around airports, are high enough to affect children's ability to learn." That must be why I had so much trouble with Latin and Chemistry in high school. An airport was directly across the street.
AOL Time Warner posts $44.5 billion loss
Salon.com
I never understood the Time Warner-AOL merger. AOL seemed but a house of cards, or rather useless start-up disks for a slow dial-up dinosaur.
Mike Wallace: I might retire, too
NY Post
Tha twould be a shame, but no one can go on forever. Interestingly, famed Tiger baseball announcer Ernie Harwell quit when he was Wallace's age {84}.
Photo of the Day
Yahoo
Check out this real life Jackie Chan. Unbelievable.
Batman 'returns with Memento director'
BBC
NOw, this should be interesting. The next Batman pic will be made by Christopher Nolan, the director behind Memento and Insomnia. While we're on the subject, about 2 months ago at Sunday Mass, after communion, the most sacred and intimate part of the service, our 14 year old son Steve suddenly leaned across and whispered rather urgently to me: "Dad, Batman is the lamest of all the SuperHeroes!" Ed, lost in his thoughts: "Huh?" Steve: "Yeah, Think about it! He has nothing!!! He's so lame!!!"
Stay tuned for eBay-TV
News.com
Just what we need: another station, clogging up bandwith, hawking crap. Our satellite system already has about 6 such stations, selling cheesy jewelry or overpriced computers. It must work, though, because there are so many of them at the moment. Translated that means, it's a cheap way to broadcast and, at the same time, turn a buck.
60 Cats Found In Woman's Home After Complaint Of Odor
local6.com
Not to be outdone by this Reno woman who had 60 cats in house, authorities seized 500 dogs from a home in Eastern Oregon. Anyone care to up the ante?
Monday 27 January
Salon's New Deal
Salon.com
Up until about a year ago we linked to Salon almost on a daily basis, but all that changed when they decided to start charging for most of their content. Well, they've decided to tweak that as it is announced that "Starting today, you can gain access to Salon in either of two ways: You can pay our low subscription price (as little as 5 cents a day) or you can click through a multiple-screen advertisement." So, let's try it out. We tried to read an article about jazz icon Miles Davis whom we saw a few years before his death. He never said one word to the audience that night, by the way, but that's beside the point. When you click on the article you must sit through a 30 second commercial. If you try to cheat and get through early, it won't work. If you have dial-up, my guess is that free-Salon is not worth waiting for, but if you have broadband, it's not so bad: sitting through that one commercial gets you the entire's day contents for free. Look for more Salon links, therefore, in the future.
Man Beating Dog With Gun Shoots Himself
AP
"Raymond Poore Jr., 43, called his wife at work Thursday and told her that their dog had bitten him and he intended to kill the animal, police Capt. David Sobonya said." No way. I am betting that somehow the dog shot this bastard.
Bare Facts on TV's Streaker
PageSix.com
The commercials in yesterday's Super Bowl were, on the whole, pretty cute, but this one with the English Streaker is the best to come along in quite awhile and here's the skinny on the naked dude.
Where did the guitar solo go?
Sacbee.com
Regular commenter BIL has been saying this for years now. Where are the guitar solos?
Thursday 23 January
I just want BANGBANGBANG
starterupsteve.com
Another, er, fine example of Flash. Semi-safe for work. This one was sent in from BC.
Attacker stops assault when victim begins to pray
Tribnet.com
A reverse Columbine-effect: The rapist "asked the woman if she was a Christian. When she said yes, he zipped up his pants, apologized and shook her hand, police said."
Ozzy does worse 2nd time at bat
NY Daily News
Ratings are way down for Ozzy and Crew. I've stopped watching, not because I'm bored but because I can't understand what's going on with all the damned bleeping.
76-Year-Old Is Carded in Wisconsin
Yahoo AP
I've been carded twice within the last year and the last time I told the clerk that I was not only older than her, I was also older either her father or mother. I was right, by the way.
All the hype
limpbizkit.com
Badboy Fred Durst finds himself involved with Brittney Spears and many of the rocker's impassioned fans cannot stand the thought. Here's Freddy's suprisingly emtional plea to his fans. WHile we're spinning rock news, the BBC reports sadly that 29 year old pop singer Anastacia has breast cancer.
Anil Dash: diamonds are for never
dashes.com
We stick our toe into the wonderful world of weblogging for this witty anti-diamond industry rant. I'm on the road a fair amount, scanning the radio dials, and these ads have had my interest for a long time. They annoyingly play to men's insecurities and women's frailities and bravo to Anil Dash for putting it into words.
Yahoo
Photo of the Day
I like to start my Mondays on the cutting edge, so here's a nice photo for everyone. Enjoy!
Read It and Steep
NY Times
The latest fad is green tea. I swill the stuff everday, in my post-heart-attack, post-java life. So Ive always wondered, just how valid are the current pro-green tea claims and here's a sensible explanation.
Gains on Heart Disease Leave More Survivors, and Questions
NY Times via Yahoo
I LOVE this quote: "In the old days, you had a heart attack and you died....You were almost signing the death certificate in advance. Now you know you can get another 20 or maybe 25 years." That should give me to the year 2023 or so.
'Sick & tired' of Iraq: Bush slams dictator's deception
NY Daily News
I'm not a fan of Saddam Hussein and if I were to open CNN.com tomorrow morning to find him overthrown, I'd be overjoyed. But I cannot understand this president's obsession with Iraq.Al-Qaeda drove those planes into the the World Trade Center and the Pentagon. Yet that seems to almost have been forgotten. Somehow the entire emphasis has been transferred to Iraq. And why Iraq and not North Korea? The latter is the one exporting SCUD's to Yemen and the like. Please tell me the answer is not oil, because that's the way I'm starting to see it.
Van Morrison case over
BBC
"The sister of rock'n'roll legend Jerry Lee Lewis, Linda Gail Lewis, had accused Morrison, 57, of trying to ruin her life by asking her for sex and telling her to divorce her husband." I don't know anything about that, but the album Van cut with Lewis, You Win Again, was the worst effort by Van in 20 years. A total waste. His latest work though, Down the Road rebounds and has restored my faith.
Ghost Ship Packed with Rotten Fish Found at Sea
Reuters
Attention Stephen King: "Australian police said on Tuesday they were baffled by the discovery of a ghost ship full of rotting fish -- but no crew or life rafts -- drifting off the remote northwest coast of Australia."
FAO Schwarz Parent Seeks Chapter 11
Reuters
Ever visit one of their stores? It's a case of the Emperor's clothing and the public has finally caught on.
Quebec Catholic church says 295 baptisms invalid
Toronto Globe and Mail
A good example of what I would call a Kindergarten Catholic: "We've always been told that if you're not baptized, you're not a Catholic, so it meant our kids didn't have a religion. If the kids weren't baptized, they'd be in limbo if they die."
Tuesday 14 January
Pete Townshend Is Arrested in Porn Case
AP
It now appears that his reason for having the porn on his machine, "doing research for an autobiography dealing with his own suspected childhood sexual abuse," was an excuse to save his neck.
Family of Bee Gee Maurice Gibb Questions Treatment
Reuters Barry Gibb, he was the balding one, states "From the fact that they had to operate on Maurice during the shock of cardiac arrest, is very questionable, and we will pursue every factor, every element, every second of the timeline of the final hours of Maurice's life."
Hotmail: A Spammer's Paradise?
Wired.com
I have accounts on both Hotmail and Yahoo and the spam I get on Hotmail is at least 5x greater.
Illinois Gov. Commutes All Death Sentences
Washington Post
If the O.J. case proved anything it proved that the system is tilted against the poor. Had OJ been poor, he would have been convicted. Now, I'm not saying that OJ did not kill his wife, but, rather that his bucks, which allowed him to hire Johnny Cochran and F. Lee Bailey, allowed him to beat the system.
Animal lover gives critters full support
Austin 360.com
ANimal rescuer often puts the animals in her bra to keep them warm, which reminds me of the time a bee flew into my Darling Wife's bra as I was driving her to work. I whipped the car into an alley and had that thing off in record time!
Vatican warning on danger of 'online confession'
London Times
Many of us Catholics have discussed this, with our tongues planted firmly in our cheeks, for several years now. If some parishes allow people to write their sins on pieces of paper which are then burned en masse, then why not evolve and accept emailed-in sins?
Thursday 09 January
Prostitute, 77, Mugged After Night Shift
Reuters
I don't know what's more shocking: the fact that there would even be a 77 year old hooker or the fact that someone would rob her.
Prayer Is Abandonment in God's Embrace, Says John Paul II
Zenit News Agency
I love areas in which Christian and Buddhist ideas intersect such as in this statement by the Pope. The Buddhists might call it "egolessness" but I think we are looking at the same type of phenomenon.
Illegal music sites 'here to stay'
BBC
Very interesting: the president of the Recording Industry Association of America (RIAA) softens his tone as he talks about "a reasonable amount of control." It's a definite shift in strategy. Notice that he is no longer speaking solely in terms about piracy.
Dean Wins FDA OK on New Beverage Technology
Reuters
My neighbor Gerald, which he pronounces with a hard "g" so that it rhymes with "Harold," told me a few months ago that this was in the works: dairy-based beverages willhave six month shelf lives soon.
Wednesday 08 January
Baby, can you drive my car?
Sydney Morning Herald
The year is young, but this story will be hard to top in the stupidity department.: "A family of three was injured in a car crash after a five-year-old boy sitting on his mother's lap allegedly steered the vehicle because she was too drunk to drive."
Jesus 'healed using cannabis'
Manchester Guardian
One of Christianity's greatest strengths has been its ability to morph itself onto just about any movement but here's a strange juxtoposition: Jesus and pot.
Group: Nuke Regulators Backed Off Plant
AP
Every year my buddy Danny and I go up to Lake Erie to catch the annual Spring Warbler Migration and we pass the Davis-Besse nuclear plant twice a day and we've joked for years about it "blowing." Looks like we weren't too far off.
Budget cuts end McDonald's network project
cw360.com
I'm fascinated by these two stories: The grindingly ever-constant rise of Wal-Mart matched with the rather sudden fall of the Golden Arches. Here we learn that Mickey D's has cancelled a plan that would have networked 30,000 of their restaurants. Now, why would they need that? Apparently they don't. But, all is not bleak in the land of cheeseburgers. BusinessWeek reports that the French Love McDonald's.
Monday 06 January
The Year in Sex
Nerve.com
My beloved mother-in-law once quipped that "half of your links are about sex." If that hyberbole was anything near the truth, then she must be very disappointed recently with the lack of sex-related links. Since I value her judgment, I don't wish to make her unhappy and, therefore, decided that today I will make up for this greivous error and we'll start with this look back at 2002.
Sex toys on review
Salon.com
So, as I said, this day's theme is dedicated to my beloved mother-in-law.
Run From McDonald's
Motley Fool.com
The once Golden Arches are rapidly becoming tarnished and it's no wonder. I think a 30 year run based merely on burgers and fries has just about everyone fed up.
At 112, she remembers Cubs in World Series
Az Central.com
You think your team stinks, pal? The year was 1908 and silent movies were just being introduced, Teddy Roosevelt refused to run for re-election, Henry Ford introduced the Model-T, GE patents
electric toaster and the Chicago Cubs last won the World Series.
Thursday 02 January
'Bushisms' make university's banned list
CNN
Tiny Lake Superior State, located in Sault Ste. Marie, Michigan {pronounced soo saint marie}, is famous for two things: an excellent college hockey team and their annual list of worn out words and phrases that should be immediately banned from the English language. I'm relieved to see the euro-tinged phrase "Homeland Security" made the list! Bravo!!
Sexual Strike in Sudan
Pravda
Borrowing from Aristophanes' Lysistrata, growing numbers of southern Sudanese women are withholding sexual favors from their husbands until their bloody civil war is over. I like the following quote: "Our women are gentle" which translates, I think, into "Not tonight, Honey, I have a headache."
Campbell stirs up its soups
Houston Chronicle
This is almost identical to an article describing McDonald's lastest plight. I don't get it: don't manufacturers realize that by celebrating so-called improvement, they are really impliedly admitting their current product is crap.
2002 Obituaries
CBS News
We tip our hats to those who have left before us.
The Action Lama
World Tibet News
Here is the "Statement by H.H. Penor Rinpoche
Regarding the Recognition of Steven Seagal
as a Reincarnation of the Treasure Revealer
Chungdrag Dorje of Palyul Monastery." Yes, That Steven Seagal.
Turning Against the Dalai Lama
Buddhist News
While we're on the subject, here's some more Buddhist news: there's a movement to have the Dalai Lama deported from India.
Rubbish!
Williamette Weekly
Upset that Portland Oregon officials allow police snooping through the garbage left in front of people's houses, two reporters turn the rather hilarious tables.
Jesus of the Week
Jesus of the Week
This week's savior reminds me of a scene in our church about 3 years ago at the Christmas Children's Mass: Santa Claus walked into a crammed church and slowly walked up to the Nativity Scene, where he knelt and prayed. I found it very distasteful.
Mass. irked by colleges' willingness to accept non-MCAS diplomas
Boston Globe Online
Several New England colleges have begun accepting non-diploma students which has prompted Co-Editor Kay to write in that "if a kid wants to attend college, he should be encouraged, not discouraged!" I'm not so sure, Kay. Perhaps community colleges would be a better choice for the non-diplomas.
McDonald`s to Post First Loss in 47 Years
Food Ingredients First
Remember when they would list the number of millions of burgers sold? Then it became billions and billions sold, but nothing lasts forever, not even McDonald's dominance.
Jesus of the Week
Jesus of the Week
This week's saviour, the vegetarian Jesus?
Sir Paul defends credits switch
BBC
A follow-up on the link we ran the other day about the credit switch, away from Lennon-McCartney and towards Songs by Paul McCartney and John Lennon. In this article Pual laughs that Yoko got her "knickers in a twist".
Judge says Barry Bonds' historic home run ball must be sold, proceeds split
Boston Globe
Fan jumps up, catches historic ball but is immediately enveloped by the maddening crowd. When they untangle another dude comes out victoriously with the ball. Guy number one sues and this what the judge comes up with? In other words, it's okay to mob somebody and steal half of what he owns.
ElcomSoft verdict: Not guilty
Cnet
A minor victory in file to file sharing: "A jury on Tuesday acquitted a Russian software company of criminal copyright charges related to selling a program that can crack antipiracy protections on electronic books." The rub is that the jury fully believed that the crack was illegal, but they didn't think the Russian firm had knowledge of such illegality. In a related matter, user AntiFrance {what a great name and thanks for the link, btw} sends in this impassioned defense of file-to-file sharing protocols: "Piracy is Progressive Taxation, and Other Thoughts on the Evolution of Online Distribution."
New York Critics Vote 'Far from Heaven' Best Film
Reuters
I think it was also my favorite film of the past year. Julianne Moore, Dennis Quaid, Patricia Clarkson and Dennis Hastert were smashing. Tell me a better movie released this year.
Monday 16 December
R-G-B
www.whitetrash.nl
Having trouble getting going today, bunky? Try this link.
McCartney, Ono in Beatles Credits Dispute
Reuters
We haven't had an obligatory Beatles link in ages, but here's news about Yoko and Paul squabbling about Paul's listing himself first on his latest album, rather than the traditional Lennon-McCartney.
Jesus was an illegitimate refugee, claims bishop
The Scotsman
England’s longest serving Anglican bishop calls Christmas a "real chore," calls pop songs about it "superficial, sentimental and false" and says that Christmas cards are "chintz." I have some choice comments to make about this, but I have to get offline to crank out 50 Christmas cards instead.
Wal-Mart sued for calling police
Salina journal The Lifetime Channel, as is evidenced in this case, has far too much influence on our culture as the police were summoned after a Wal-Mart photo employee discovered "pictures showing her 3-year-old daughter topless playing in the family's back-yard kiddie pool with her father, and one showing their daughter's naked bottom as she lay on the living room floor."
The Sopranos: Season 4 Analyzed; Week 13
Slate
That's it, the fourth season is over and it went out with an emotional bang instead of the much anticipated and hinted at mob hit.
Supermodel's Suicide Bid
Sky News via Yahoo
Evidence that one can be bonkers and beautiful at the same time: "she claimed...she had been raped by fashion sex predators and that she and other models had been used as sex slaves by senior members of police and French government."
Snake bites man on penis
News.com.au
This one's sent in by Wayland, who writes that it reminds him of the punchline from an old joke: "He says you're gonna die, Kemosabe." Never heard that one, Wayland, but it sounds painful.
Painless tests may stop colon cancer
Detroit Free Press
I heard this being advertised on the local radio, quite humorously, and it sounds like an excellent idea.
Vicar tells children 'Santa is dead'
Ananova
Makes our telling the kids that there is no Santa seem pretty tame, but one of my sisters freaked over even that, stating that we were robbing our kids of "precious memories."
Work at Cheney home disturbs D.C. neighbors
Chicago Sun-Times
"The Navy says the explosions are part of a construction project that has been going on for several months now, but won't say more because the project is classified." Just how deep are they going? On the other hand, maybe they shouldn't be publicizing this.
Audioslave Deliver Like Santa Claus, Creed Booed At Radio Show
MTV News
This gives me a chance to vent about the state of today's music. More precisely today's pop FM music, led by Creed, Goo Goo Dolls, and the like. I hear this stuff all the time now because I've shifted my daily 5 mile walk indoors and it's driving me crazy. I may have to get headphones just to block this crap. Every song in this genre sounds the same. There's a deep, gravelly voice that starts the song, accompanied by some accoustic guitar. Then the tempo pick up, the electric guitars and the drums kick in, the pace quickens, all while the angst-driven lyrics build. Then suddenly, just before it ends, the accoustic guitar and the singer painfully echo the main theme of the song for the thirty-third and last time. Usually it's a lament something along the lines of Creed'sOne Last Breath:
"Hold me now
I’m six feet from the edge and I’m thinking
That maybe six feet
Ain’t so far down"
To which I add:
"If jumping will end
This god-awful type of crap-ola
Then maybe jumping
Ain't so damned bad."
Anti-war activist Philip Berrigan dies
Salon.com
Former priest was arrested more than 100 times and served a collective eleven years in prison. He and his brother Daniel were known, with either derision or praise, as the Berrigan Brothers.
It's not our fault we're morally superior to U.S.
Toronto Star
I agree, however to our Canadian friends take note: most Americans never think about Canada. Ever. They simply don't care, but then they've never tasted Coffee Crisp!
Forgotten Pippi Longstocking Work Unearthed
Reuters
There was a time when Pippi Longstocking ruled our house. Our then-10 year old daughter Mary was in love with the Astrid Lindgren character. But when I took her to the Pippi movie, it was so bad that it seemed to burst the bubble and we rarely head about Pippi again.
Photo of the Day
The Adventures of Accordion Guy
Those whacky Japanese!
Thursday 05 December
Thanksgiving Obesity Lawsuits Sweep US
Borowitz Report
Add my name, I'm going to sue my sister Annie in suburban Detroit. She had entirely too much pumpkin pie at her meal last week.
Eccentric Lord Seeks Lady of the Manor
Reuters
Yesterday we talked about the weird Rolf Eden who wants to die in bed with a hooker. Today we read of an English dude who has advertised for an attractive 25-35 year old woman of independent means to become the Lady of a stunning English manor house.
German Playboy Offers Cash to Any Woman Who Can Kill Him — With Sex
ABC News
It's weirdness day and we start with 72 year old Rolf Eden who is offering $125,000 to any woman, from anywhere in the world, who can kill him with sex. Cable has a movie about homicidal hookers just about every night. He should have no trouble.
Kite takes flight with Norwegian in tow
Fresno Bee
"The giant kite lifted the 25-year-old more than 30 feet off the ground in a gale-force gust, until he let go and crashed onto the gravel playing field below." Didn't Curious George do this 40 years ago?
Fox gets extreme for new channel
The Hollywood Reporter via yahoo
Just what we need: a 24 hour extreme sports channel. What's next? A 24 hour ABC-only soap opera rerun channel? A channel devoted to old National Geographic specials? A channel devoted to what is under Scottish kilts? And while we're talking about the bizarre and extreme, what's up with Michael Jackson? 2 weeks ago we saw him dangle his child off of a balcony. Then we got a look at his nose and now we discover that Jackson in Court on Crutches After Spider Bite. This high-pitched, talented, dancing dude has turned into a one-man freak show. It's like a wreck on the side of the road. You don't want to watch, but you can't turn away. But I have an idea. How about a 24 hour Michael Jackson channel? They could run his videos, interviews with Larry King, Diane Sawyer etc., toss in some Janet, run daily the three or four lousy movies of the Jackson family growing up, and run ads for LaToya's Psychic Hotline..
Tuesday 03 December
Color is coming
to U.S. paper money
MSNBC
"New designs will start with $20 bill." Didn't they just redo the $20 bill a few years ago? Sounds like that was a failure. And, by the way, I hate the newly-coiffed look of Andrew Jackson.. It makes him look like ESPN'sPeter Gammons.
Boston Archdiocese may file Chapter 11
Salon.com
It might be a sound fiscal decision, but it's lousy P.R.. Where's the compassion? What about that so-called preferential option for the poor that we heard so much about in the late 80's 90's? This is why I cringed when my Darling Wife and I were at Mass several months ago in the Big City and the young priest announced that he had finally finished his MBA. Everyone clapped, but not me. This is what happens when priests have MBA's. Meanwhile, in other news, United Airlines also appears headed for bankruptcy
. Unlike the Church, United has a good reason: September the 11th. The rumor, of course, is that the government may have to take over all of the airlines. Perhaps that is what Rome should do in Boston! But, don't fret, dear people. All is not bleak. Krispy Kreme Profit Rises 55 Pct.
Noel Regney, 80, Songwriter Dies
NY Times
We start the Christmas season with news that the man who wrote "Do You Hear What I Hear?" is dead. I see that he also wrote a song I loved when I was about 12: Goodbye Cruel World.
Dominatrix Pleads Not Guilty To Manslaughter
Boston Channel
And then she panicked and she and her bf got rid of the body? I am not buying this. She needs Johnny Cochran: "If he couldn't breathe, you've gotta let her leave." Meanwhile, we're on the subject, The Washington Post exposes one of the current UN Weapons Inspectors as having no degree but runs ads for his business citing his work for the UN and is 'a founding officer of the Leather Leadership Conference Inc., which "produces training sessions for current and potential leaders of the sadomasochism/leather/fetish community'."
Wednesday 27 November
RadioShack won't ask for info
Pittsburgh BizJournals
I've always found this distasteful and often gave a phony address and name. By the way, we're heading Up North for turkey and hope to have more links up Saturday. Happy Thanksgiving, everybody and Congratulations to Wayland and his wonderful wife on the birth of your second child!
Seattle Marks Jimi Hendrix 60th Birthday
AP
Hard to imagine Jimi being 60. Son Steve and I argue about Hendrix periodically. Steve's claim is that there are plenty of modern day guitarists far better than Jimi ever was. I counter that you don't have a Stevie Ray Vaughn, for example, unless you go through Jimi.
Cage, Presley to End Three-Month Marriage
Reuters
While getting my hair cut 2 weeks ago I read that "Nicolas Cage wants to close Graceland." I guess they can scrap that plan. I still think it was weird that Cage, who has played an Elvis impersonator in the movies, would marry The King's daughter, a woman who bears an uncanny resemblance to her father.
Tuesday 26 November
WWJD? Protest Wal-Mart!
The Nation
Why single out Walmart for supporting sweatshops? I went shopping the other day, in a far more upscale store, and found shirts made in Malaysia, Cambodia, Bangladesh, Pakistan, China and my favorite so far....Mongolia. I mentioned this to the salesman, who was unaware, of course: "Mongolia? Can you just imagine who made this shirt? Probably some Chinese prisoner. Do you want me to ring it up?" I passed and bought shirts made in India and Ukraine.
Who's hot and who's not in basic cable?
TV Guide
Here's the list of who's not: A&E, CNBC/MSNBC, VH1 and BET. I don't watch any of them since Geraldo went off.
Crowds Rampage After Ohio State Win
AP
I'll not use this as a forum to whine that my beloved Maize and Blue were robbed by lousy refereeing. My Darling Wife and I were coincidentally up in Columbus, not to see the game, but to eat and see movies, and we saw three films:
Michael Moore's anti-gun Bowling for Columbine, the chick movie Real Women Have Curves, and Far from Heaven, which stars Julianne Moore, Dennis Quaid and Dennis Haysbert. All three are very good and well worth seeing. I'd rate Real Woman the weakest of the three and Far from Heaven the best, beating out Columbine by a hair, only because some of Moore's politicizing is heavy handed. It was a great weekend. despite the refs. Thanks Darling.
Fury at bras for girls
London Sun
2,000 black lacy children's bras a week were being sold in the U.K., but public pressure is starting to knock them off the shelves.
Bids for Eminem house hit $500,000
Detroit News
Unbelievable; I know this neighborhood, Timken, near Nine Mile. In fact, I lived in it from 1952 through 1955 and have memories of the streets being paved. It's a semi-ghetto now.
A Short History of Fruitcake
Village Voice
As my Darling Wife and I head off to the Big City for a kid-less weekend of sushi and movies, I leave everyone with this heretical statement: I like fruitcake. But it has to be at least 11:30 at night before I can eat the stuff. Have a nice weekend, everybody.
Ind. City Names Alley for Letterman
NC Buy.com
I am so jealous! When we were kids in Detroit, we practically lived in the alleys. They were great places to sneak a smoke, to share some guy's Playboy or to use as escape routes when people were chasing us, etc.. While we're on the topic of Dave, here's his Top Ten Least Impressive James Bond Gadgets
. Via Fark.
Top Islamists accuse US of leading new crusade
ArabNews.com
That's what happens when radical fundamentalists get into the act: innocent believers get sucked into the picture. Of course we're going after fundamentalist Islamics who are targeting us, and, of course those same fundamentalists are denouncing our actions as being Anti-Arab and Anti-Islam. And, unfortunately, of course moderates on both sides get sucked into the extreme.
Hendrie takes radio show to TV
Variety via Yahoo
We don't get the zany Hendrie out here in Hooterville, but, if you haven't heard Phil, here's the basic premise: Hendrie, a master of many voices, runs a talk show where he's both the interviewer and the interviewee. As the guest he says the most preposterous and outrageous things and then counts on listeners to not know the ruse, which always happens. The unsuspecting, angry listener calls, argues and it's great fun.
85 Percent Of U.S. Cole Slaw Remains Uneaten
The Onion
You have to page down to the News in Brief to get to this lil' gem. Personally, I can't stand the sight of cole slaw. Have you ever wondered where this awful substance got its name?
Abortion Foe Admits to Killing Doctor
AP
Crazy bastard: "An anti-abortion extremist awaiting trial on charges of murdering an abortion doctor admitted carrying out the sniper attack but said he meant only to wound the man, and 'the bullet took a crazy ricochet.'
"
Aborigines want money for names
Melbourne Herald Sun
"An Aboriginal group is demanding Melbourne councils and communities pay thousands of dollars to use native words to name suburbs, parks and streets." And the Queen of England wants money anytime anyone says the phrase British Columbia and the Iriquois Nation wants royalties anytime anyone uses the word Michigan..
Byrd, at 85, Fills the Forum With Romans and Wrath
NY Times via Yahoo
"Senator Robert C. Byrd has been virtually alone in asking why the Department of Homeland Security is necessary." It's not the existence of the Department that bother me, it's the name! What is with this Homeland jazz? Have we suddenly become Germans? I don't think they're the ones I want to ape.
Wednesday 20 November
Oscar-winning actor James Coburn dead at 74
CNN
Oddly, on the very day Coburn, who had a ph.D in 'being cool,' died there was a half-page ad in our Hooterville paper entitled James Coburn Tells How He Beat Joint Stiffness.
Doctor With a Dark Past
ABC News
Interesting story: 23 year old and his girlfriend kidnap a coed, hold her for $500,000 ransom and then bury her while running off with the loot. He's caught, serves 10 years, eventually goes to medical school and, after graduating, Indiana {aren't you still licensed there, my Darling Wife?} inexplicably lets him practice, albeit with some restrictions.
Elephant kills keeper at Pittsburgh Zoo; facility closed today
Post-gazette.com
"There are no plans to destroy the animal." I'm sorry, but that animal should be put down. It would be an insult to the deceased's family should this beast be allowed to live.
Monday 18 November
Painful pearl procedure
leaves peckers perky
Mainichi Daily News
We start our week with some nifty alliteration from this reliably wacky Japanese site. My spell checker, by the way, does not recognize pecker..
Statement Warns of Attacks on U.S.
AP
Just what universe is al-Qaida in, anyway? In their latest message, we hear that there will be "more attacks in New York and Washington unless America stops supporting Israel and converts to Islam." Yeah, like that's going to happen.
In J.F.K. File, Hidden Illness, Pain and Pills
NY Times Camelot was but a charade: "By the time of the missile crisis, Kennedy was taking antispasmodics to control colitis; antibiotics for a urinary tract infection; and increased amounts of hydrocortisone and testosterone, along with salt tablets, to control his adrenal insufficiency and boost his energy." My Darling Wife also remembers reading that Jackie smoked up to 3 packs a day. I guess that's fair: the press hid both his infidelities and her smoking habits.
Turin Shroud Said from Middle Ages
Discovery.com
People want hard, physical evidence to support their beliefs. That's why such a fuss was made last month when that box was found with Jesus' name on it. The Shroud and the Buddha's tooth are the same sort of animal. None of it is true; all of it is true.
Gun Company Must Pay Teacher's Widow
Click10.com
A jury has awarded the widow of teacher Barry Grunow $1.2 million from a gun distributor. She won claiming that the gun was "unsafe, defective and lacked features that would have prevented a minor from using it." I feel oddly ambivalent about this one. On the one hand, some sort of control of firearms is sorely needed. It would be hard to argue that the Bushmaster assault weapon used by the snipers was envisioned by the Founding Fathers {and Mothers}. For instance, I would object to passage of the NRA sponsored bill S. 2268 which "would prohibit victims of gun violence from holding the gun industry accountable in court." Yet the wording of this suit, that the gun "lacked features that would have prevented a minor from using it," is nonsense. How complex should a gun be? People's mechanical skills vary. Our 14 year old can physically finesse many objects a lot faster than I. Look for this to be reversed or whittled down upon appeal.
The Sopranos: Season 4 Analyzed; Week 9
Slate
Sunday's was a most disturbing episode. Tony whacked my favorite character, crazy Ralph and we even got to see them carrying the head out.. The NFL and NHL have nothing on Tony!
Thursday November 14
Marxists' Apartment a Microcosm of why Marxism Doesn't Work
The Onion
Their 'method' is the same one moms and dads use to get their kids to help with household
chores. No wonder it failed. They don't have the mom and dad experience to make it work.
Jesus of the Week
jesusoftheweek.com
A special political JK2K in honor of the recent election day.
5 Victims From Crushed I-95 Cab Identified
Miami Herald
I drive south to Florida on I-95 nearly every winter, and there
are always enough idiots hitting 80 mph while darting in and out of the path
of tractor-trailers that there are times I seriously consider flying instead.
Almost.
Fowl Play
ABCnews.com
A policeman's work is never a bed of down feathers. Bawk!
Bobby Brown to Face Court
BBCnews Whitney Houston's husband and an international star in his own right, Brown is sought on charges related to driving under the influence six years ago. It took them this long to catch up to him? Must've been all those chickens they were chasing.
Freshmen Get Orientation on Capitol Hill
Foxnews.com
The Forbes.com quote of the day from Francis Bacon seems to fit here: "Nothing doth more hurt in a state than that cunning men pass for wise." Especially when said freshmen feel like the first day of high school, "where you have to learn where the" restrooms are!
A Classic!
Canoe.ca
In search of simpler times, here's a food critic's perfect peanut butter sandwich. I prefer my own version of the classic PB&J, Peanut Butter and Jalapeno!
Three in Amish family killed, two injured in truck-buggy collision
CNN
We had an Amish family about 4 miles from us a few years ago and it would scare the hell out of me to see that buggy on the local highway, being passed by idiots doing 75 mph. They need to get into the 21st century or to get off the roads. Luckily for our local bearded ones, their farm failed before they were crushed beneath an eighteen wheeler.
Monday November 11
America's new favourite son
Manchester Guardian
The acclaim for 8 Mile, and the bucks, just keep rolling in. Besides it gives me an opportunity to tell about the time I was abducted on 8 Mile and Van Dyke so many years ago, as soon as this comment-thingie gets fixed.
Wellstone pilot exaggerated airline experience
StarTribune.com
It looks less and less like an evil plot, and more and more like Princess Diana's unfortunate death. Or was that part of the plot, too?
Playing by the Rules?
LA Times
People are constantly amazed to hear that I hate Disney. Here's a perfect example why: "Top song on Radio Disney is by a Disney Channel actress under contract to a Disney label.
"
Internet cat torturer gets slap on the wrist
Mainichi Times
I'm using this as a lead in to an excellent long NY Times Magazine article about the growing movement towards animal rights.
Sunday 10 November
Santa's a killer, cops say
Detroit Free Press
Santa kills his daughter in an argument over Christmas decorations? This kind of thing is why my Darling Wife never wants to move back to Metro Detroit.
Current Ebert Reviews
Chicago Sun Times
While we're on the subject, here's Roger's review of Eminem's 8 Mile, which I eventually want to see since I grew up on 6 Mile.
Monkeys invade Anambra Government House
Daily Times of Nigeria
I wonder if we'll be getting emails soon from the monkeys, wanting access to our checking accounts?
Ossuary was genuine, inscription was faked
Israeli Insider
Remember that bone-box that was recently discovered and had the name Jesus inscribed on it? It was probably a forgery. While we're at it, have you heard about the frost on a Saskatchewan window? Believers swear it's an apparition of the Virgin Mary.
Photo of the Day
Yahoo
We open today with a photo of, who else, Winona Ryder, born Winona Horowitz and named after the town in which she was born, Winona Minnesota. Reading the IMBD bio page, we find that she was "Goddaughter of Timothy Leary and her parents were friends of Beat poet Allen Ginsberg and once edited a book called "Shaman Woman Mainline Lady" an anthology of writings on the drug experience in literature." My favorite Ryder role, would probably be of Kim Boggs in Edward Scissorhands.
Gephardt to Pass House Leader Post
AP
Well, here's one good thing that's come out of Tuesday's election. Goodbye rabid dog. Bring in the next one. Meanwhile, Europe is bracing themselves for the triumphant Bush and Saddam must be feeling a little more vulnerable today.
Philip Morris OK to change names
MSNBC
The Altria Group? A quick look at the Oxford English Dictionary Online finds no such word. You can use the OED online for free, by the way, if you belong to the Quality Paperback Book Club. One last thought: You can run, Morris, but you can't hide.
Wednesday 06 November
Man Loves His Coffee Crisp
The Toque
Meant as satire, but this is no joke. Coffee Crisp is the best candy bar on the market and there have been reports that Nestle's is slowly expanding it's move into the American market.
Fridge that yields e-mail leaves us cold
CNN
Regular contributor Cate passes this one along with the comment "Oy!" What's the matter, C, don't you approve of consolidation?
Babs sees crash conspiracy
PageSix.com
Echoing a phone call I got from our Oldest Son Tommy last week, Streisand apparently buys into the theory that two Democratic Senatorial candidates going down in small plane crashes just prior to their election dates can not be coincidence. I wonder what they would be saying if the candidates had been Republican. Meanwhile, Peggy Noonan thinks Mondale was too mean in his one and only debate with Republican Coleman and thinks Coleman will win as a result. I'm going to put my money on that old warrior Mondale, however, to get back into the Senate.
Wal-Mart expands Linux offering
ZDnet.co.uk
Check this out: Wal-Mart will offer Linux-based PC, PC's capable of getting online, without monitor for $200. Meanwhile, Dell will be selling their PC's soon at Costco for $1000.The 200 buck linux system sounds very interesting. However, Microsoft has threatened to sue, claiming the Lindows system that Wal-Mart's cheap computer is using as its OS, is a rip off of Windows.
McDonald's settles vegetarian lawsuits
Chicago Tribune
I'm using this link as a springboard to blast Mickey D's and Wendy's for not following Burger King's lead in introducing the veggie burger. I tried it; it's good and I'll be back for more.
Smell Memory Separates Wine Tasters from the Rest
Reuters
"Wine experts often use a torrent of language to disguise the fact they can't always put a name to the aroma they are smelling." Going through our 5 bottles of reds, I've come up with such phrases as "unique personality," "a deep briary flavor and supple finish," "this youthful, exuberant Merlot exploding with red-berry fruit and cherry-like aromas," "velvety structure," and my favorite: "the skillful blending of parcels has created the quintessance of soft Australian Shiraz." Salut!
Thursday 31 October
Wellstone campaign chairman apologizes for service's partisan tone
TwinCities.com
We called this one yesterday when we commented, in advance, about how mean-spirited it was for the family to uninvite Vice-President Cheney. Once that was allowed, others apparently became emboldened and partisanship reigned. Wellstone was Senator for all Minnesotans, Republicans and Democrats alike.
Mondale Says He'll Run for Senate if Asked
NY Times
Here is our winner of the non-story of the week award. Of course, he'll run. He's a politician. It's akin to the fox eating the gingerbread man in the middle of the river.
MTV sets date for "Osbournes" return
Salon.com
Mark your calendars, Ozzie and family will soon be back. I still maintain that the show would have been far more effective if it had been on HBO, which would have allowed us to hear the precious cursing.
Photo of the Day
Yahoo
While yesterday's photo showed why soccer will never make it in North America, today's makes a good case for an emerging Asian sport, sepak takraw.
At Request of Wellstones, Cheney Will Not Attend Memorial
NY Times
I realize the family is in total shock, but this smacks of mean-spiritedness. After all, Cheney is also their Vice-President. And, while I'm taking cheap shots at Democrats, here's a list of the ten richest US politicians. Six Dems made the list, with the top Dem, Mass's John Kerry, coming in at $550 million.
Photo of the Day
Yahoo
One more reason why soccer will never make it in North America.
Unveiled: the blueprint for United States of Europe
UK Independent
Uh-oh, I detect a trend. First the EU becomes the United States of Europe, then some exterior force threates that union and the USE is forced to bond with the USA, Canada, Australia and New Zealand, forming The United States of Mostly White People..
Jesus of the Week
Jesus of the Week
This week's saviour belongs on the WB.
The Sopranos: Season 4 Analyzed; Week 7
Slate
This one goes out to my Darling Wife. Knowing the reaction it will bring from our regular commenter BIL, I offer this link, and to those who might object because of perceived sexism, I offer this.
Viagra gives wildlife a boost
New Scientist
No, deer and bears aren't popping pills, but, rather, men are easing up on purchases of such stellar products as powdered rhino horn or panda bear teeth, or whatever the hell those stupid yokels thought would help them.
FBI agents grab sniper as he flees
London's News of the World
It seems 17 yr old John Lee Malvo made a pathetic attempt to escape as he was being questioned. What also interested me about this story was the quote: "During a spot-check on October 8, he was parked and asleep at the wheel. But cops failed to look in the boot {trunk}, where they would have found the Bushmaster XM15 rifle." If the Brits knew anything about our search and seizure laws they'd know that the ppolice cannot legally obtain evidence in a trunk, unless the search is somehow related to the stop, and finding a sleeping man in a car does not warrant opening a trunk.
The Smoking Gun: John Allen Muhammad
The Smoking Gun
The four page Washington Superior Court order of protection which barred probable-sniper John Muhammad from contacting his wife and the couple's three children.
In ironic twist, driver of white van key to arrests
Baltimore Sun
You see what happens when you piss off a substantial segment of society? This driver of a white van was upset because of all the stares and attention he got, so he catches the sniper.
Antibacterial Soap a Waste of Time, Experts Say
Reuters
Have you heard some of these antibacterial commercials? They portray a dangerous, unsafe world and cash in, therefore, on all of the bad news that bombards us daily. Want to be safe from snipers? Wash your hands some more.
Former spy boss Richard Helms dies
BBC
We say goodbye to another of Tricky Dick's boys, Dick Helms, the CIA boss during that heinous era. Helms's possible pass into heaven just may be his refusal to stop the Watergate investigation, a move for which he was sacked.
Should We Pay Off the Sniper?
Slate
I know, I know....but, to tell you the truth, this was my first thought as well when I heard about the so-called demand.
Russia to Create Different Kind of New World Order
Pravda
Think the Cold War is over? Maybe not. Here the Russians serve notice that they will not allow their Iraqui oil interests to suffer under a regime change.
Judge: Disabilities Act doesn't cover Web
Cnet
Finally, some sanity! "U.S. District Judge Patricia Seitz said the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) applies only to physical spaces, such as restaurants and movie theaters, and not to the Internet."
French author cleared of race hate
BBC
"French writer Michel Houellebecq has been cleared of inciting racial hatred by saying Islam was 'the stupidest religion'. " More sanity, this time from across the pond. His best defense, I think, is that Islam is not a race, nor can Muslims be said to be a race. Therefore, no racial hatred.
Tuesday 22 October
Bush On Economy: 'Saddam Must Be Overthrown'
The Onion
Submitted by Oldest Son Tommy, includes this great caption of a store going out of business photo in a local mall: "A Massillon, OH, department store closes while, around the globe, Hussein's reign of terror continues."
Saddam Invited to Virginia Gas Stations
BBSpot.com
While we're in this vein, here's some more: "Bush also suggested Hussein and his aides could learn a lot about American capitalism by touring local retailers like 'the Big Lots on West Hurley Avenue around 5:15 pm on Wednesday.'"
Washington sniper not God, FBI confirms
Rockall Times
Even more: "A detailed record search showed the master creator had been around pretty much every deed of senseless violence and cruelty committed during the last thousand years. Sometimes as a main suspect, multiple occasions as a accomplice and more times than can be counted as a justification"
In Rejecting Sex-Abuse Policy, Rome Rejects Erosion of Authority
NY Times
My beloved mother-in-law and I were in rare agreement several months ago when this subject came up. So-called zero-tolerance does not protect the rights of the accused. Times login: edportals password: edportals
Gandolfini Comes Clean
E! Online
The more actor James Gandolfini's past is examined, the more it appears he isn't acting when he's in his Tony Soprano role.
Double Gender-Swap for Hungarian Couple
FunReports.com
Unfortunately, as we go to press {upload} the comments are down. Hopefully they will be back up soon. Our weekend report is back, by the way, not because of popular demand, but, rather, because of one mild suggestion and we start with this mind-number from Hungary, or as Ray Davies put it: "Girls will be boys, and boys will be girls.
It's a mixed up, muddled up, shook up world."
Photo of the Day
Yahoo
Proof that the Chinese are in for turbulent times.
Current Ebert Reviews
Chicago SunTimes
Roger's takes on the latest releases, including Michael Moore's new one Bowling for Columbine, and the new Adam Sandler film that stormed through the Cannes Film Festival.
Real snipers resent D.C. shooter
CNN
And another thing: notice that this bastard hasn't gone into DC's rather large ghetto to shoot innocents. Why? Because they'd shoot back.
Dan Savage: Savage Love
Seattle Stranger
Our favorite sex-advice columnist has to pop six Xanax before boarding a plane, post Sept 11, and, as a result, is in no shape to write a column Instead, he goes off on somewhat incoherent Anti-Canadian rant.
Top 10: Wacky Lawsuits
AskMen.com My visiting brother-in-law and I were talking about this just the other day and he recommended the death penalty for such litigants. Of these ten, my fave is the soda machine idiot, may he rest in peace. Via Fark.
Eyebrow ring leads to lawsuit
GazetteNet
This one was sent in by Cate who highly doubted the legitimacy of the described Church of Body Modification. Hey, you can become a minister for only $50. Beats Divinity school, no?
Photo of the Day
Yahoo K-Mart's secret weapon to overtake Walmart. Maybe they can carve out some kind of niche to stay in the market, but they are never going to overtake the high and mighty Walmart.
Wednesday October 16
Photo of the Day
Yahoo
I count thirty one butts in this photo, but, all joking aside, let us hope they catch the bastards responsible for this very quickly.
Herbal Maladies
Tech Central Station
Nice piece on the so-called herbal remedies. We have only one health-food store here in Hooterville and, in it, Aunt Shirley gives out advice like a corn-pone pharmacist, telling people that "this is good for arthritis" and "this is good depression," etc. . I've never heard Shirley advise anyone to drink wine, but perhaps she should since there's a startling new study about the effects of wine and beer drinking on dementia.
Nigerian E-Mail Scammers Reported On Run
PC World
Other than our regular commentator BIL, who has admitted giving Nigerian Colonel Ambayah access to his checking account, I know of no one who would give these guys fifty cents.
Photo of the Day
Reuters
Okay, I've been maligned enough by female readers over the many photos of Anna Kournikova I've run over the past 3 years, so I am finally running the equivalent from the opposite sex's point of reference. I hope this evens the score.
Pope to Mark 24th Anniversary, Change Rosary
Reuters
"The pontiff will change the rosary -- the most universal and commonly known Catholic method of praying -- for the first time in nine centuries." The Pope will switch away form the Hail Marys contained in the rosary because of the Hail Mary passes that North American football has developed.
Muslims prepare for the 'Coca-Cola War'
UPI
Muslims around the world have decided to hit the US where it hurts, by banning Coca-Cola. Somhow I don't think Zam Zam Cola is going to cut it.
Stones dismiss 'crap' early songs
BBC
I remember walking over to the world's very first Kmart in 1964 to nab a copy of England's Newest Hitmakers, which didn't have any crap ballads, as I recall, just a bunch of reworked Chicago blues tunes.
Photo of the Day
Yahoo
And you thought you were having a bad day? I had a hard time choosing between this gory photo, pardon the pun, or this one.
Friday October 11
LeBeau will jump in river if Bengals win
Cincinnati Enquirer
Setting a dangerous precedent for all coaches, or as my visiting Brother-in-Law quipped: "if your team is already in the tank, what's a little more water?"
Spongebob Squarepants is a Hit With Gay Men
Out in America.com
This show is on in our house about 45 times a week yet I somehow still haven't watched it, but I do have some ideas about that one telletubby.
KSL Pulls Leno Show With Penis Performers
Salt Lake Tribune
It's ok to air gangster movies and the XFL, but performers who talk about their penises are a no-no. How lame, and, of course, it had to be in Utah.
God's creatures: The blessing of household pets has increased in past 30 years.
Indianapolis Star
Our parish had their 2nd annual blessing of the animals last week and our junior priest told a touching tale Sunday of how it was pouring and very few people were showing up when suddenly a small minivan pulled up and out came 3 dogs, 2 cats, a caage full of rabbits and a very wet llama to be blessed and the congregation laughed and I just don't get it. What's next, will Scooter be sitting with us at Mass one of these Sundays?
Riyadh 'to fingerprint US visitors'
BBC
"US diplomats say Saudi Arabia is set to impose tit-for-tat immigration procedures on American citizens." Did I miss the day 19 of our citizens flew airplanes into some Saudi buildings, killing thousands?
Beauty Highlighted as a Way of Evangelization and Unity
Zenit News Agency
I thought immediately of someone like this or this as an evangelical tool, but that's what some Muslim fundamentalists in Iran, etc. are claiming is indeed happening, with the West's immoral ways swallowing Islam. To them, the strike against the West was a strike against immorality. This article, however, is about St. Bridget of Sweden.
Wisconsin dad, ordered to stop having kids, loses appeal to U.S. Supreme Court
JS Online
A Manitowoc baby-making machine is ordered to stop, despite the argument of his liberal attorney, Laurence Tribe, who argued that "Procreation ... is at the very heart of the personal rights protected by the Constitution." Tribe, by the way, would be sitting on the Supreme Court, if Bubba would have had his way.
Cable Conquered, What's Next for 'The Sopranos'?
NY Times
Apparently a movie. What's next, action figures? A Sugary cereal? How about marinara or a pizza chain, with a smoking gun as its symbol?
The Sopranos: Season 4 Analyzed; Week 4
Slate
Mwanwhile, here's this week's Sopranos shrink analysis, and as I predicted, my Darling Wife, they diss Jennifer's shrink. He's an idiot. While we're at it, here's CNN's well-written review.
Monday October 07
Bad Things That Can Happen When You Masturbate
McSweeney's
The words of a visiting Polish priest still echo in my head some 42 years later: "Your mother and father would cry themselves to sleep if they knew what you are doing."
'Meteorite' hits girl
BBC
Confirming what osteo wrote in the comments Friday: "The British are only funny when you can see them. Everyone knows that."
Beatles Reunite for Harrison Tribute
E! Online via Yahoo News
If Ringo were to die, then every time McCartney played in public the Beatles would be reuniting, using this logic.
Scientists release 'world's best joke'
News.com.au
No, it does not have the word Nantucket in it and, frankly, I don't find it funny and, I bet, our comment contributors can easily come up with funnier stuff.
McDonald's cuts fat but ignores antibiotics
Food Production Daily
Ever wonder why your five year old isn't responding to his or her ear infection medicine? The answer might, in part, be in those vile chicken mcnuggets that all kids seem to love.
UPS sues Gator for wrongful delivery
Cnet News Gator.com is a leach of a company, a system-sucking parasite that I've had to remove from our kids' computers many, many times. Anyone who sues them is a hero.
Thursday October 03
Polish Cardinal tackles radical radio
BBC
Interesting article about the growth of radical fundamentalist Catholicism in Poland the push to stop it. The official Church radio station, by the way, is named Radio Jozef. Joseph, the father of Jesus, was probably the most silent person in the Bible. In fact, it never speaks of his death, poor guy.
Child Dials Police to Report Grandma's Dumplings
Reuters
I had the same reaction to some of the Polish food that my grandmother tried to get me to eat when I was a youngster, with the worst being pigs feet, which was something enclosed in gelatin and had vinegar poured over it. Speaking of ugly, The Toronto Star asked their readers to send in photos of ugly furniture that they own, and you can vote. I voted for the bird lamp.
Spokeswoman: Parks wants barbs in film deleted
Detroit News
Here's a shameless plug for our Rosa Parks Portal, a site that gets heavy use during Black History Month, but is rarely used during the balance of the year. Yesterday, for example, it garnered 164 hits, whereas in February it pulls in 2500 hits a day.
E-mail virus is bugbear for users
BBC Bugbear, the latest net worm, steals not only passwords, but also credit card info. One helping hint, however, is the size of the attachment it comes in: 50,688 bytes. In other net news, last week I was in the Hooterville Staples, stranded hopelessly third in line and moving nowhere when I started chatting with the fella in front of me who was buying a wireless network for his business and he had an interesting fact: these things can broadcast up to a thousand feet. "That means I can set one up in our house and half the neighborhood could use it to get online." "Sure," he replied, "in fact, they are setting up 'free internet' zones in some European parks in which all you have to do is to have a laptop with a wireless setup to get online." Well, today's BBC has this feature coming to NYC.
Scolding Kids Harms as Much as Hitting, Study Says
Reuters
It's great in theory, but in practice, try speaking in measured tones on a hot, sticky summer day when one of the kids puts a jar of pickles into the fridge with the top not screwed securely in place. Seconds later, of course, another kid comes along, picks up the jar, drops it and the pickles and the juice completely cover a floor that you had just washed a mere five minutes earlier. If, at that moment, you can speak in a measured tone then move over Mother Theresa.
Tuesday October 01
Myth Dispelled: Shoe Size, Penis Size Not Linked
Reuters
It turns out that penis size is directly related to the amount of time a man watches football! The more football he watches, the bigger the penis!
Priest Admits Sexual Relationship
Macon.com
MIght as well run a headline stating that the sky is blue or that Detroit Tigers suck. Of course priests have sexual relationships. The sexual instinct is a normal desire. Shame on the Church for putting their clergy in such an untenable position.
Porn Spam: It's Getting Raunchier
Wired.com
Even my beloved mother-in-law has noted this. Spam is out of control and must be stopped. When one dude in suburban Detroit can send out 300 million emails in one day, someth8ing is very wrong with the system. Notice that the US Senate and congressional elections are less than five weeks away, but no candidates are taking up this cause, which, in certain high tech areas, would seem to be a no-brainer. I get so much Hotmail spam that the account automatically shuts down after three days unless I clear it out.
Monday 30 September
Free-Range Burritos; Is This McDonald's?
NY Times
This might interest my Darling Wife. Remember that Mexican fast-food place, Chipolte's. that we went into the other night in the Big City? The food was decent, and, it turns out, Chipolte's is owned by McDonald's.
Blondes 'to die out in 200 years'
BBC
Not as long as there's Revlon, they won't. But, all kidding aside, this is a dumb theory. Blondes have obviously been around for thousands of years, and suddenly they are supposed to die out within the next two hundred years? How stupid.
Stop the holy showboating
Salon.com
Writer takes up a cause I've been pushing for years: "Listen up, jocks: God doesn't care if you score a touchdown."
GOP's Romney Showcasing Good Looks
AP
The Mormon Romney — named one of People Magazine's 50 most beautiful people, is the front-runner in the Massachusetts gubernatorial race. I don't know anything about him except that he's the son of the late governor of Michigan George Romney, who, in 1967, was well on his way towards the Republican nomination for the presidency when he stumbled and publicly admitted that he had been "brainwashed" into believing the LBJ pro-Vietnam war stance. George, no pretty boy to be sure, watched his ratings sink overnight. But, I stray. Let's get back to Mitt and this pretty-boy thing. Looking back at our Republic's history, I think you can focus on two critical moments, the Civil War and World War II, and Presidents Lincoln and Roosevelt. Needless to say, they were not pretty-boys. Of course, they didn't have television then; a fact which probably saved us!
Mystery of renowned zen garden revealed
CNN
Maybe some of this study-money should go to curing cancer or AIDS, instead of stuff like this. This theory sounds very shaky and, in the end, is unprovable.
Brothel Found at Car Repair Shop
AP
Reminds me of the time when my beloved mother-in-law remarked that the local photo shop might be into porn because of the tarty appearance of the cashier.
U.S. warns Nigeria over online fraud schemes
ComputerWorld
I recall the first time we got this. It was about six years ago and in the mail! The other day I had 4 versions of it in one day, including a hideous new Russian strain.
Susan Sarandon Talks Chick Flicks
NCBuy.com
Here's the quote of the day: "they don't call man films `dick flicks'." Her analogy is not only off, it's derogatory and shows her deep-seated man-hating anger. And this from a woman who bared her breasts in the 1978 film Atlantic City? She also slams the "white, heterosexually-driven male business."
Photo of the Day
Yahoo
To show I am not an apologist for white heterosexual men I'll run this link.